Changing Hearts Read online

  I’d slept some on the plane. “No, not yet.”

  We ended up in front of a massive building that could have been a palace or a school. When we got out and entered, I quickly realized where we were.

  We were led to a corner room where a guy sat in front of a picture window overlooking gardens in the back. Sawyer stood for a moment without speaking. I saw the pain in his eyes. He hadn’t truly let go of the guilt over his brother. When he caught me staring, his expression morphed into a smile.

  “Finn,” Sawyer said, moving forward to greet his brother.

  When the guy turned, I was amazed by how much they looked alike. Finn was more blond, but outside of that, they were definitely brothers. I also didn’t expect him to look fit, though he was on the thin side.

  “Finn, this is my girlfriend, Shelly. Shelly, this is Finn.”

  I walked over and stopped. Sawyer and I hadn’t talked about the extent of his limitations and didn’t want to insult him.

  “It’s okay.” He winked at me. “You can shake my hand.”

  With no hesitation, I took his hand in mine and ignored that his fingers didn’t squeeze mine back.

  “I like her already.”

  “Stop banging her with your eyes, man,” Sawyer said.

  “Dude, I’m a quadriplegic, not dead.”

  Sawyer groaned.

  “You are so Sawyer’s brother.” I laughed.

  “Better looking, though, right?”

  “I was just thinking I got saddled with the wrong brother,” I joked.

  Sawyer glared at me with amusement. “That’s messed up.”

  “What can I say, the ladies like me. The nurses too. I think I knocked one of them up.”

  Sawyer turned serious. “You didn’t?”

  “Dude, quadriplegics need love too. She laid me down and sat on my face before she sat on my dick. Sorry, Shelly, I hope I’m not offending you.”

  I waved him off. “I’m used to the Cargill brothers now.”

  Finn said, “She’s met Tomas?”

  Sawyer nodded. “Did you really get a nurse pregnant or are you shitting me?”

  “I’m serious. Mom thinks it’s great. Something about stem cells and shit from the kid. But I’m already getting feeling back in my toes. They say it’s possible for me to walk one day.”

  “It will happen,” Sawyer corrected him. “Not about the kid thing. Are you really ready to be a dad?”

  Finn rolled his eyes. “It’s not like I’ve got anything better to do.”

  “Haven’t you been taking classes?”

  “Yes. Not much else to do.”

  I watched Sawyer deflate and took a chance.

  “Maybe you can talk your brother out of playing football.”

  Finn gave him a quizzical look. “After you got laid out and ended up in the hospital. Do you love football that much?”

  Sawyer’s eyes darted between us until they settled on his brother.

  He took more than a minute before he spoke. “It’s just I owe you.”

  “For what?”

  Finn seemed honestly surprised.

  “Everything.”

  “What the fuck, man, you didn’t put me in this chair.”

  “Didn’t I? I should have been watching out for you.”

  “Or maybe I should have let the stupid ball go, or how about the asshole who was speeding down the street.”

  “But—”

  “But nothing. You can’t hold onto shit like that. If you’ve been playing ball for me, that makes me fucking responsible you got hurt too. Besides, I like basketball more than football. Are you going to switch sports?”

  I wanted to hug Finn and I did.

  “Damn, that was nice,” he said when I kissed his cheek. “Now if you weren’t so skinny, I’d steal you away from my brother.”

  “Dude,” Sawyer warned.

  “Hey, two skinny people shouldn’t do it. Bones on bones is not a good feeling, man. Besides, it’s not like she didn’t think, that guy is hot when she saw me. If only he weren’t in a chair.”

  I didn’t question if he truly felt anything.

  “I actually think you’re perfect,” I said.

  “She’s a keeper, Sawyer. Don’t fuck it up.”

  “I don’t plan to,” Sawyer said and winked at me.

  “Now, when are you busting me out of this joint?” Finn asked.

  “Where do you want to go?” Sawyer seemed ready for this.

  “No Italian. When Ashton came last, we did Italian.”

  “Ash came?” Sawyer’s brows shot through the roof.

  “Oh shit, I’m not supposed to tell you.”

  “Why?”

  “He feels as guilty as you do about my situation and doesn’t like that Dad has me hidden away so I don’t see you guys that often.”

  Sawyer tone wasn’t bitter. “I’m glad he comes.”

  The school or whatever it was had transportation that got us to the restaurant. A nurse joined us. Finn didn’t seem at all embarrassed that she fed him like a baby, so I wasn’t either.

  “See what I’m talking about? Women will do anything for me, even cut up my food.” Finn winked at me.

  He hadn’t introduced the nurse as the one he knocked up, only as Carrie. But I was curious as hell.

  Sawyer was unabashed. “So, are you doing my brother?”

  Carrie’s face reddened.

  “Don’t pay attention to him. He has no filter,” I said.

  “None of us do.” Finn’s devilish grin brightened the room. “I thought you met Tomas too?”

  “I did.”

  “Blame our parents,” he said to me, before turning his wily gaze on Sawyer. “And bro, don’t ask Carrie what you don’t want me to ask Shelly. Besides, you guys are letting this lovely meal grow cold. Eat up. That includes you, Shelly. You’ve barely touched your food.”

  Sawyer glanced at me. I shoved back the insecurities and tried my best to eat what I ordered without guilt.

  We didn’t end up going to France. Finn was thrilled to have his brother and I couldn’t see taking him away. I suggested that we stay and hang out with him. Although he didn’t say it, I could tell Sawyer was grateful.

  On the plane ride back to reality, Sawyer seemed a little distant.

  “You’re quiet,” I said, getting in his lap as he sat on the sofa.

  “There’s something I should tell you.”

  “What?”

  He licked his lips. “There’s this code and I’m breaking it by telling you this. But you should know.”

  That scared me. Code? What the hell did that mean?

  “There is this organization I was supposed to join.” He paused as if choosing his words. “The other night when you were pissed at me, I went to a meeting.” I started to worry about what he was about to say. “There were a lot of women. I could have screwed any of them.”

  “Did you?”

  He focused on me as if he were about to impart vital information.

  “No. That wasn’t even a question. I only want you.”

  If he’d said that in freshman year, I wouldn’t have believed it. So much had changed and there wasn’t any doubt in my mind that he was telling the truth. I spent the rest of the flight showing how much I only wanted him too.

  When we arrived back home, Sawyer’s dad sat in the living room.

  “Why are you here?” Sawyer asked.

  FIFTY-THREE

  Sawyer

  Dad’s imperious expression didn’t scare me like it used to.

  “Did you enjoy your all-expense paid trip?”

  I didn’t feel guilty about it, so I nodded.

  “So how was Finn?”

  “Why don’t you call and ask him yourself?”

  The man stood and slightly towered over me. Like in chess, it was a check move. “Don’t be a child.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “I need to know where you stand.”

  “Between you and Mom?”

  �
�On my campaign. I need to know if you are with me.”

  “Why do you want me there? You didn’t want to claim me as yours.”

  Dad steamrolled over my comment.

  “You’re a man now. Let’s talk like men. You heard the story. I thought you were my brother’s child.”

  “Yet, you didn’t even treat me like a nephew. You treated me like an unwanted guest.”

  His jaw ticked. “I’m sorry for that.”

  Not that I believed him. “You’re not forgiven.”

  He pursed his lips. “We don’t have to like each other.”

  “Good, because I don’t.”

  I could tell my father wasn’t sure what to make of me as his eyes narrowed.

  “You still need to finish school.”

  “About that, I contacted the firm handling my trusts. I have one from Mom’s parents that will fund my education. I don’t need you.”

  He tried to play his trump card.

  “I’m still your father.”

  “Then start acting like one.”

  He didn’t dignify that with a response other than to leave without another word.

  Shelly came over, worried. “What will he do?”

  “I don’t know.” I pushed a hand roughly through my hair. “I wasn’t lying. If we have to move, we can get another place.”

  “For all of us?”

  “Yes.”

  The way she looked at me made me feel larger than life.

  “You are some kind of wonderful,” she said.

  “I don’t know about all of that.”

  “I do.”

  Ash came in the front door with his bag in his hand. He must just be coming back into town. Shelly knew me better than I thought and excused herself. He and I needed to talk about all that went down with the Vanderbilt Society over the last several months, but not today.

  “How was your trip?” I asked when we were alone.

  In typical fashion, he shrugged. I thought about my brother and how Ash had gone to see him over the years. I went over and hugged the guy.

  Ash’s brow quirked.

  “No matter what happens in this life, you are my brother. Just because I’m with Shelly doesn’t mean I don’t need my best friend.”

  “Getting sentimental on me?”

  “I’m getting shit straight. I haven’t told her yet, but I’m thinking about talking to a therapist to work shit out.”

  It was a subtle hint that Shelly used on me that I was trying with Ash.

  He grinned. “She’s good for you.”

  I agreed. “She is good for me.”

  He came in and gave me another quick hug. “I’m happy for you, brother.”

  Our friendship spanned almost our entire lifetime. Because of that, I knew he was telling the truth. Now it was time for him to share some truth with me.

  “Did you go see Julie?” I asked. “Or maybe you spent time with Kent?”

  He patted my arm. “That’s for me to know.”

  “Keeping secrets from me now?”

  “Don’t you think it’s about time?”

  There wasn’t a way I could be mad at him for that. He left with a smile on his face, one I’d missed seeing. It was some good shit.

  I found my girl in my room wearing only one of my shirts.

  “You look tasty,” I said, closing the door behind me.

  “Yeah, I was thinking ice cream or whip cream or both.”

  “Shit, I’ve never done any of that before.”

  “Sounds like a winner to me.”

  Instead of heading to the kitchen, I took hold of her waist.

  “You know, you changed me.”

  Her smile was electric, shocking life into my already hard dick.

  “You changed me too.”

  “It’s more than that. I thought I was immune to that love shit. I thought Kelley and Chance were crazy for sticking to one chick. I get it now.”

  Her expression was thoughtful. “You make me feel worthy of love.”

  “You’re worthy of everything.”

  “You are to me too, which is why I don’t want you to play football anymore.”

  It was something I’d been thinking a lot about.

  “I promise you I won’t do anything to risk my future with you.”

  “Future?”

  I nodded. “I see you in my future. You changed my heart, my soul.”

  Her eyes searched mine. “That’s a lot of power, changing hearts.”

  I wrapped my arms around her.

  “So take care of mine, firecracker.”

  “Back at you, heartbreaker.”

  Epilogue

  The view from the top of the Eiffel Tower was breathtaking. So was the guy standing next to me.

  “What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?”

  “Like how insane this is to be in Paris.”

  Over the past several days, we’d toured the Louvre and taken selfies with Mona Lisa. We’d taken a romantic dinner cruise on the river Seine. It had lightly rained, which hadn’t stopped him from kissing me senseless. I’d gotten wet for more than one reason, leaving us peeling our clothes off as soon as we’d gotten back to the amazing hotel room. We’d visited Versailles, which was so incredible, including the golden gates out front, the spaciousness of the castle, to the gardens out back, including the dancing fountains.

  He dazzled me with that grin of his. “So you like your graduation gift.”

  “Yeah, but you didn’t have to do this.”

  He’d given up on a safari trip to do this for me.

  “I believe that’s rule number five in the boyfriend handbook: to spoil your girlfriend.” He held up a finger. “Which is why I’m taking you shopping tomorrow.”

  I would have protested, but it felt like the ground moved under our feet. That was crazy, wasn’t it?

  “You felt that?”

  I bit my lip as I bobbed my head. I tried really hard not to be freaked out about it.

  “I’ve got you.” He turned me a little when he wrapped his arms around my waist. I leaned my back into his chest. “It was built to move a little.”

  “You could have warned me,” I said, angling my head up to him.

  “And miss that look on your face?”

  Sawyer had to be the cutest boyfriend ever. He’d taken a ton of pictures of us. So I wasn’t surprised when he lifted his phone and snapped a picture of us. His caption to his post was on top of the world with my girl.

  “We have time before our dinner reservations. What do you want to do?”

  Talking about dinner didn’t make me crazy as it used to. I’d gained a few pounds, less than a handful over the last several months. It was still a struggle, but I tried not to obsess about it. The therapist had me talking about my father basically leaving our family. The more we talked about that, the more I was convinced he’d been the catalyst in me wanting to over improve myself. My parents still hadn’t divorced, though it was looking more and more like that was an inevitability. I’d finally come to accept that maybe my mom would be better off.

  “Can we stay here a little while longer?” I suggested. I turned to face him. “I have something for you.”

  Freeing an envelope from my bag, I handed it to him. I’d been waiting for the right time to give him his gift. He opened it and got all wide-eyed when he saw what was inside.

  “A two-week, all-expense paid safari trip in Kenya.” The way his jaw did that awed expression made it worth spending a huge chunk of my graduation money on it. “You didn’t have to do that, firecracker.”

  I did. “You did all of this for me.” I spread my arms at where we were. “The plan is to leave from here in a few days. We’ll get back in time to go see your brother in London.”

  “I’m speechless. This had to have cost you—”

  Spinning around, I lifted on my toes to press my lips to his. “You’re worth it.” I grinned at him. “Though we are flying coach.”

  He laughed. “As lon
g as I’m with you, we could be on a prop plane.”

  “Don’t say that. We just might be.”

  I pressed my face in his chest and heard his voice rumble there.

  “Everything is changing. Kelley’s in Texas. Chance is staying in Oklahoma. My little brother is having a kid, though Dad is insisting on a DNA test.”

  His dad had given up his bid for presidency, probably because Sawyer and his mother had refused to play as pawns in his game. Though I had to give him credit for trying hard to repair his relationship with his wife and sons. We’d been to see Finn a couple of times after his dad had visited.

  “I hope it’s his. He’s so excited about it,” I said about the possibly of Finn being a father.

  “I know.”

  Sawyer sounded so contemplative. Not wanting to change his mood, I switched gears. “And we have two weddings to go to later this summer.”

  “Yeah, I won’t get to see you for several weeks while you go on a trip with your mom and then you’re going to Vegas with Lenora and Brie.”

  I shook my ass a little, thinking about how much fun that was going to be. “That’s right. Vegas, baby. Are you jealous?”

  Chance wanted something low-key, and Lenora convinced Kelley not to follow her to Vegas.

  “I’m still trying to talk them out of going to a dude ranch.”

  I giggled. “It sounds like fun.”

  He eyed me and tried to frown, but ended up laughing. “I’ve got him almost convinced we should go to Veil instead.”

  “No.” I couldn’t stop my chortles. “The cowboy hats and spurs will be priceless.”

  “What happens on the dude ranch, stays on the dude ranch.”

  I still couldn’t hold in the grin.

  “I don’t know what’s worse. Ash wants us to stay in a haunted hotel.”

  “That would be cool.”

  Ashton had been happier the last several months. He smiled and talked more, though he was still secretive about who was putting the smile on his face. We all had our theories. But the important thing was everything seemed to be clicking into place.

  Sawyer glanced at his phone. “We should head down to the lower level for our reservations.”

  We were eating at the restaurant in the Eiffel Tower, which required reservations way in advance. I had to wonder how long he’d been planning this.