Craving Dragonflies Read online

  His shoulders lifted in a shrug and he disappeared into the night.

  I wasn’t sure why I felt responsible for Willow, but I did. No doubt Willhouse invited her to get at me.

  I pushed my way through the crowd. As I brushed against those I passed, the feeling of a thousand red ants scurring under my skin attacked my senses. For once that didn’t matter, as my driving need was to get to her.

  Even I could admit she made a pretty picture. Several of my frat brothers noticed too, eye fucking her from head to toe. She stood with a bunch of other people near a keg. Still, the cup in her hand worried me as Willhouse kept glancing at it and her.

  “Don’t drink that,” I said, snagging it from her hand.

  Some of the liquid sloshed over the side coating my fingers.

  “What?” she asked, looking away from the guy who had been chatting her up, and glared at me. “What’s wrong with my drink?”

  It could have been my approach or the fact that the music wasn’t yet turned up to ear-splitting levels, but we’d caught the attention of everyone around us.

  Willhouse pushed off the wall and folded his arms over his chest.

  “Yeah, Westborough, what did you put in her drink?”

  He was saving face for the house and putting any potential rumors on me.

  “Nothing,” I heard myself say.

  Sawyer and I had never attended the virgin party before, so I had no real idea what went on. We’d only been privy to the boasting about what we’d missed.

  Willow held out her hand. “Then kindly give it back.”

  I did the only thing I could with all eyes on me. I drank it down and vaguely recognized a salty under taste in the beer.

  Willhouse roared with laughter.

  “Here, darling, let me get you another.”

  She gave him her sweet smile as he used the tubing kit attached to the keg to fill up a new cup.

  When he handed it to her, Willhouse started a chant, “Chug, chug, chug.”

  She looked at me with those damnable innocent eyes of hers, and I shook my head slightly. Her brow arched, and the chant only got louder as she defied me. The cup went to her lips as her head tilted back. Her throat worked as she swallowed the entire contents.

  I didn’t notice I was toppling forward until a hand caught my shoulders. I spun around because that touch didn’t hurt and found Sawyer.

  “Ash, what’s going on?” He glanced around. “This isn’t you.”

  There was so much judgment in his glaze, I shook out of his hold.

  “That’s the thing. You really don’t know me.”

  His arms fell to his sides as I blinked, trying to clear my vision from the identical Sawyer triplets I was seeing.

  “What’s really bothering you is you lost your lap dog. I wish you’d just leave me alone.”

  Sawyer’s jaw tightened. “If that’s the way you want it. Fine.”

  He strode off heading for the front door. When I turned back, Willow was gone. A cup was thrust at me and I tossed back its contents, wanting nothing more than to find oblivion.

  I stumbled toward a wall and pressed my back to it so I could get out of the milling crowd and figure out my next move. I knew something wasn’t right when the party swayed like we were on a boat in choppy water. It felt like someone turned up the heat, and I swiped a hand over my brow.

  Further evidence that I’d inadvertently drunk something I shouldn’t was the instant hard-on I got when I found Willow standing near the base of the stairs. Her ass in that dress made it painful for me to look at her. My dick was so hard I could chisel stone into sculpture with it.

  Willhouse was on the stairs handing out keys to the women waiting there. He gave everyone a random key from the small basket he held, all except Willow. He pulled a key from his back pocket and gave it to her.

  Red dotted my vision, and I launched forward. No fucking way he was going to have what belonged to me. My steps hitched as I thought those words. I shrugged it off. I’d marked her safe from everyone here, including me. That was all I meant.

  My hand was balled and ready to strike when I reached him. All the girls, including Willow, had disappeared upstairs.

  “I will—”

  Willhouse held up a hand. “Chill, brother. Your girl is safe. I gave her the key. Sawyer said it was okay.”

  My mouth went dry as I struggled for words. Sawyer had left. Then again, I hadn’t watched him leave, and even if I did, he could have come back. Besides, he always got what he wanted.

  “That’s okay, right?” Willhouse snickered. “You guys share everything, right?”

  His words were like the code to open my vault of memories. Flashes of Sawyer and me over the years and all the women we’d shared.

  “Get out of my way.”

  Willhouse stepped to the side as I charged up the stairs like a bull.

  “Like a virgin,” someone sang.

  I grimaced, but didn’t stop. Willow deserved better than this. She probably had no idea what she’d really gotten into. Oh sure, Willhouse would have explained the rules and given her the option to stay or go, but she wouldn’t know whose room she was entering.

  I got to my door and raised my hand to knock. What the fuck was that all about? I couldn’t make myself turn the knob. What if she was in there with him? I leaned on the frame, trying to make a decision when I heard her.

  “Am I really doing this?”

  I busted in, wanting to protect her from Sawyer’s corruption. At first, I only saw her. She was pushing her dress off her shoulder and froze in shock.

  Then I heard Sawyer’s disembodied voice. It sounded so far away, I wasn’t sure what was real and what wasn’t. But his face solidified in front of mine.

  That penetrating stare of his snagged my will, making me submit. He didn’t have to say anything. His smirk was command enough. I knew my role, but I hadn’t totally given up my voice. I looked past him to her.

  “You really want this?”

  But Sawyer flickered in front of me and I closed my eyes.

  “I think they put something in my drink,” I muttered.

  Sawyer hadn’t heard. Instead, he looked over his shoulder at her. That’s when I noticed her mouth was moving.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Yes, I want this.”

  I turned back to Sawyer. His smirk was epic, and his eyes bore into mine. Though his mouth didn’t move, I swore I heard him say, you take the lead.

  Never once had I. But with her, that seemed important.

  “Take off your clothes.” Sawyer was speaking the same line he’d said a thousand times before to the girls we’d played this game with, but his voice sounded like mine.

  He must have moved behind me, though I hadn’t heard him. I didn’t bother to look for him as the sight before me was rapturous.

  Time held no meaning as she removed her bra, letting it fall on the heap her dress had made. I dropped to the tiny blue panties she wore. Her gentle curves made my mouth water. I wanted to feast on her breasts like a man starved. I had to fist my cock in submission as it tried to make a jailbreak from my jeans.

  “Fuck,” I groaned.

  I hadn’t been this aroused in my entire life.

  When the blue cloth found the floor, I licked my lips. She wasn’t bare there. A swath of golden curls covered her slit, and I wanted to taste her.

  “Lie down.”

  Had I said that?

  As she moved, a voice in my head commanded me to undress. I pulled the black tee over my head. Before I went to her, I turned for Sawyer. He wasn’t there, and then he was, egging me on with a wink.

  Eating pussy had never been a favorite pastime of mine. It required too much physical contact. Inevitably, the girl would want to touch me, and it would kill my mood instantly. But at the moment, I thought I might die if I didn’t stick my tongue so deep in her cunt I could lick her ovaries.

  I blinked. What the fuck did I just think? I shook my head and my dick throbbed,
reminding me of my mission.

  She lay there shivering.

  “Are you cold?”

  I still wasn’t sure if it was Sawyer or me speaking, but I went with it.

  Glazed eyes met mine, and she gave me a tiny head shake indicating no.

  “Spread your legs.”

  I could have moved them on my own, but I feared if I touched her, the instant pain would kill everything. She would see it as a reflection of her.

  Get out of your head, Ash! I thought.

  I searched for Sawyer, needing reassurance. He wasn’t where he had been. I swung my head around, and then I found him at the foot of the bed.

  What are you waiting for? his stare asked.

  The room swayed a little. His lips hadn’t moved, but that was his voice in my head.

  Willow’s eyes were wide, and I wondered how long I’d been staring. She started to cover herself.

  “Don’t.”

  Slowly, her hands moved to her side.

  “Reach above your head and hold on to the edge of the mattress and don’t let go.”

  It sounded like me, but it couldn’t be. I never spoke. Sawyer was the commander.

  She nodded and did as she was told.

  One knee on the mattress and it dipped under my weight. I moved into position and bent down to taste her as Sawyer practically dared me to. Fuck, it was liquid nirvana. I covered her pussy with my mouth like I was bobbing for apples, but let my tongue find her center and suck on the bud. She gasped, which only fed the beast that hid inside me. I licked her slit until I found her entrance and curled my tongue inside to taste her honey.

  Stars in my eyes reminded me I needed to breathe and had me coming up for air.

  “Hold on, baby, and don’t fucking let go.”

  Sawyer would say some shit like that.

  Her muscles quivered with need, and I took a chance. I slid a finger inside her as I sucked her little clit into my mouth. She writhed underneath me. Until she was coming, I finger fucked her and licked her until she was boneless beneath me.

  Afraid my dick would explode if I didn’t get inside her now, I think I said, “I have to have you.”

  It wasn’t exactly a request, but I waited until she nodded in agreement.

  I didn’t bother with pulling my jeans completely off. I shoved them down far enough to free my cock. It bobbed in anticipation. I fisted it and rubbed it up and down her slit, covering it in her juices before plunging forward. All the breath was stolen from both of our lungs as we froze.

  I was so far gone, any thoughts of what I should have done before pushing balls deep inside her were lost on me. But some part of me remembered she was a virgin. The tight hold her pussy had on my cock was another reminder.

  “Are you okay?”

  She nodded, then I was moving. She was so soft and wet I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. I stroked between her legs as the friction we created built something inside me I’d never felt before.

  As her body tightened around me, I saw rainbows.

  What the hell?

  The room lit up in colors like one of those old-time disco balls was above me. For a second, I wondered if I was jerking off until a muffled scream sounded beneath me. Her pussy milked my dick until I was coming so hard I was sure I filled her up.

  Spent, I crushed her beneath my weight as we both panted.

  That’s when I saw the unicorn. I rolled off her when it asked me if that was good for me. My back found the wall as I freaked the fuck out.

  I thought I might have heard Willow’s voice in the background, but other woodland creatures joined the unicorn and surrounded the bed. I closed my eyes, trying to block out what I was seeing.

  A hand touched my face, and I jerked my eyes open. For a second, it was Willow, but Sawyer’s face replaced hers, though she spoke through his mouth.

  “Are you okay?”

  I closed my eyes again, praying it would all go away. When I opened them, Sawyer was still there. This time it was his voice I heard.

  “You’ve always wanted to fuck me, and now you have.”

  I scrambled so fast off the bed, I lost my balance. Pain blossomed on the back of my head, and darkness took everything away.

  22

  Willow

  * * *

  There was no time for me to process what I’d just done. One minute he was inside me like for real, then he was staring off into space like he was seeing ghost. He’d scrambled off the bed so fast, my first thought was what had I done wrong.

  Naked and crouched before his still form, my heart was beating so fast I could hardly catch my breath.

  “Ashton?”

  There was a small cut on his head, but it hadn’t bleed all that much. I shook his body, wondering if I should call 911. How embarrassing. Before I could go for my phone, his eyes opened and held me in place.

  “Kiss me.”

  He cupped the sides of my face and drew me down. His lips were soft as he only exerted gentle pressure. When his tongue licked the seam of my mouth, I opened for him. I hadn’t been kissed a lot, but this was far better than anything before.

  When he pulled back, I savored the taste of him on my tongue. I could already feel something in my heart for him. It wasn’t love, but it was a hell of a lot of like.

  “You kissed me back,” he said.

  Wasn’t I supposed to?

  My confusion was compounded by the reverent way he stared at me. By his look, I had to be the most beautiful thing in the world.

  His smile faded, turning quickly into a frown, and he let go.

  “You’re going to pretend it didn’t happen, aren’t you?” I opened my mouth, but clamped it shut when he spoke next. “Typical Sawyer.”

  He thought I was Sawyer. My heart plummeted as several questions lit up my brain. Did I look that much like a dude? Who had he thought I was when we had sex?

  His eyes rolled and not from a potential concussion. He got to his feet in all his naked glory. I got a really good look at his penis and, damn, it hung there, long, thick, and heavy. Semi-hard, I guessed, but what did I know?

  “Maybe you’re not even here.” He swiped a hand over his eyes. “Whatever was in that drink has fucked with my head.”

  I sat back as he lay down on his bed. Not real? The ache between my legs said it had very much been real.

  His words replayed in my head. Someone had spiked his drink. A cascade of images flooded my mind all the way back to the drink he took of mine. Next was his voice telling me not to drink it. He’d practically begged me with a pleading gaze, but I’d been annoyed he’d interrupted another boy from talking to me when he didn’t want me for himself.

  I glanced up to the bed and found his eyes closed. I knew practically nothing about concussions, but I’d remembered something about not letting the person sleep.

  On my knees, I crawled over to the bed.

  “Wake up, Ashton.”

  At the same time his eyes popped open, I felt something oozing out of me and down my leg.

  An indulgent smile played on his lips. “Willow, you shouldn’t be here.”

  I’ll admit, I wanted to cry. Though I wasn’t sure what he believed about what happened to us, his message was plain and clear.

  He reached out, but stopped shy of touching me. His fist balled. “Don’t cry. It’s just these guys are assholes, and I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

  I wiped angrily at the tear that spilled from my eye as his shut again.

  “You can’t go to sleep,” I said, trying to hold it together.

  My feelings were all over the place. I wanted to ask him if he remembered us having sex or did he think it was Sawyer. But did I really want to know? My first time would be something I could never forget and to know it was a lie would hurt far too much.

  He’d shut his eyes again and rolled to the side, giving me his back. I reached for his shoulder and shook him some. He yanked out of my hold, and panic filled eyes lanced me.

  “Plea
se don’t hurt me.”

  I froze and not just because of what he said. It was the childlike voice that freaked me the fuck out. Was he just tripping on some drug? I really knew nothing about him. Then, his eyes slammed shut and he held them that way, so I knew sleep hadn’t claimed him. His body started to shake. I glanced up at his face, but he’d rolled away from me again.

  What should I do? I pushed at my hair, which had curled at my nape. I probably looked like a hot mess.

  He still shook, so I assumed he wasn’t asleep. I found my phone, which thank God had reception, and searched the word concussion. As much as I wanted to leave and forget this night happened, I couldn’t leave him until I knew he was okay.

  According to my Google search, he hadn’t shown any of the visible symptoms like slurred speech or vomiting. The only thing was the loss of consciousness or maybe he’d just passed out from the drug or alcohol he’d taken. And he had held a conversation with me. I found that a misnomer was not letting a concussion victim sleep. It said they could.

  I let out a breath and decided what to do. I badly wanted to flee, but what if he did start throwing up whether from a concussion or something else? If he choked and died, I could never live with myself. So I found my clothes and put everything on but my underwear, which I’d used for quick cleanup.

  He hadn’t used a condom pinged in my held. What had I been thinking? Truthfully, I had been a little drunk myself. Add in a dose of fear that I was about to lose my virginity to one of the hottest boys on campus and I’d lost my damn mind.

  When I turned to look at him curled into a ball, my heart broke for the beautiful boy. I feared that if nothing else that he’d said and done tonight, there was truth in that fear coming from a little boy inside him. The pain in his words trumped any hard feelings I had about him not knowing who I was.

  Besides, if he’d drunk my drink because he knew it had been spiked, he’d saved me yet again. How could I blame him for any of it?

  I spent the night watching over him. My eyes drifted shut a few times as I sat in his chair, but his muttered, terrified words would wake me up. As the sun came up, hours later and he hadn’t hurled or retched, I was pretty sure he’d be fine.